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Costumes: the New York City Ballet.
ATTN BALLET DANCERS: Since we live next to the equator line in 100% humidity, our whole life is a sauna. So can someone from a colder/dryer climate please explain to these to us?
Are there not more aesthetically pleasing ways to keep warm? Sweatpants, maybe?
Gymnastics: 200 HANGING CRUNCHES FYEAH
Ballet: By crunch you mean kashi right
Gymnastics: 200 ONE-ARM PUSHUPS FYEAH
Ballet: The only pushups I do are bras. These bitty titties ain't gonna lift themselves, you know
Gymnastics: Relevés how do you do this thing properly :( :(
Ballet: YOU ARE WEAK AND TINY FOOLS
Our dream reality show involves the American and UK national gymnasts training with the Royal Ballet/the Royal Ballet School for several months. Or the Russian gymnasts training at the Bolshoi.
Either that, or an hour a week of Ethan Stiefel dancing/training/making coffee/hanging with Gillian Murphy/doing serious and important artistically director-ish things. Topless.
Duplicity: Svetlana Zakharova.
Tiny dancer: Lilia Podkopayeva.
Her technique may not be perfect, but she remains the only gymnast who had both the sylphic elegance and the stones to attempt fouettés on carpet.
The quiet light.